Stress, anxiety, fear is encompassing our world right now. A Pandemic fraught with uncertainty. People are wiping shelves clear, brawls over grocery items, streets are bare, and businesses are suffering. Some schools are closed, some are not, some messages are clear, some are confusing and Australian families are taking a heavy blow.

By Dr Emmanuella, March 23, 2020.

How are we to cope?

We all cope differently and there are many reasons why – how in control we feel, personality, how we perceive a stressor, and whether we think a solution exists. We only have time for one response and that’s action, avoidance is not an option. 

We are shocked by how some people are behaving. Uncertainty breeds this type of behaviour because people feel out of control. We don’t have control over this Pandemic, but we can see this an opportunity to strengthen our resilience and really, we have no choice because the responsibility lies with us.

Small business owners know this feeling all too well. If we do this, the bonus offer is that it reduces anxiety or feelings of helplessness and boosts self-confidence which can increase motivation, making us more likely to succeed – not a bad secondary gain and skill we need to persist in business.

How do we do this?

We are hard-wired to search out certainty – that’s why we like habits, routine, and to know what will happen next. We don’t like uncertainty because we feel out of control and it makes us stressed and anxious. Anxiety is caused by our tendency to over-value thoughts of future threat – the “What if’s” and it attracts an excessive need for control – to gather all the information possible, to overly prepare and plan (e.g., excessive purchasing of toilet paper is an example of people anticipating the scarcity of toilet paper) all to prevent the worst case scenario in our quest to feel safe.

Unfortunately, while we have good intentions, these actions don’t make us feel safe, they make us feel even worse and distract us from actioning what’s important now.

Decision making is hard under these circumstances because the information we crave is often blurry and unattainable. While this may feel artificial, business owners have the skills already because business is all about uncertainty. Surely the trade-off here is we will embrace uncertainty which will make life easier to deal with.

The Antidote:

Find a reliable source and stick to it:

Try to avoid rehashing information with friends, the medical profession knows more than we do and in line with marketing research, consistent messages are reliable. So, find a source that suits you, listen, read, and repeat.

Flexible thinking is an asset:

So, given we are forced to deal with a flood of uncertainty, we must accept that we won’t have control, a trait we call cognitive flexibility and act.

Flexible thinking is a component of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), one of the most empirically based treatment models; the emphasis is placed on how our thoughts impact how we feel and behave most of the time. Quite frankly, flexible thinking is not positive thinking – positive thinking doesn’t work, unless you believe it.

Coronavirus is a perfect example of life not being rosy all the time. So why do we expect to think positively about it? Flexible thinking allows for life to throw us curve balls, unlike business where you can sometimes predict them, life isn’t like that. Flexible thinking allows us to be aware of our thoughts, target inflexible/unreasonable thoughts, and come to a more flexible/reasonable view and keep things in perspective.

This is not easy, many things are at play – thoughts, schemas, emotions, experience, temperament – the list goes on.

What’s my reasonable view about Coronavirus? I can assure you I’ve had to dispute my thoughts too – here’s what I came up with:

• ‘this is a moment in time (history making, yes),
• changes/adjustments are required and they are an inconvenience (all part of life),
• you can still feel anxious and go about your daily life,
• relaxation, mindfulness and exercise helps reduce stress which is good for our immune system,
• the medical profession are onto it and a cure is looming,
• being inactive only makes you feel worse, and
• life will go on during and post Coronavirus – things will be different and we will start ‘rescheduling life’ and approach it with even more experience.

If we choose a flexible outlook when we are in a situation where we feel out of control, we can modify, progress forward, reduce distress and strengthen resilience.

Modify your attitude:

Let’s start with mine. With the recent addition of DiDi to the ride service, I found myself rather excited because it meant I could ‘play them against Uber and Ola, forgo a Taxi and guarantee a cheaper ride.’ My attitude and behaviour were not aligned.

Community spirit is important, and so is the survival of businesses because the impact on people’s mental health, if these two don’t align, concerns me greatly.

Luckily, self-awareness, flexible thinking, and observing other people’s behaviour is one way to change our attitude. So, let’s spread an attitude of acceptance of others, community spirit, and an empathic attitude to lead the way around the world to cure the insular outlook this Pandemic has caused.

Take stock and decide:

Do you work from home? Do you keep kids home? You are the experts in your home and in your life, so assess the situation based on the information you have at the time and decide.

The good thing is once a decision is made, you will feel better and feel more in control. Don’t fall prey to hindsight vision, it just halts decision making – no decision is ever perfect. 

Those who are dealing with juggling the kids every morning, and those who are now trying to simulate life and routine at home – please breathe.

Change is inevitable and we will have to change the way we action our life routines. Human beings are not good with change and kids crave consistency and routine, so what can parents do? How do parents explain these evolving changes to their kids? Check out the following template ‘Tips and Scripts’ to help alleviate some of your worry during this tough time. 

Prop up your immune system:

Overall physical health, particularly our immune system, benefits and operates better when we take the necessary precautions to avoid infection by engaging in healthy hygiene practises (which we are nicely in habit of now). Our immune system is strengthened by healthy ‘clean’ living – exercise, eating healthy, sleeping well, and reducing stress.

Although these ingredients may not seem easy to implement right now, you must persist, do, and then build momentum. Behaviour Therapy tells us the more we do something and feel good, the more motivated you feel to repeat that behaviour again. You will need to do things differently, just like you do every day to grow your business. This attitude has never been so necessary.    

Calm your mind: 

Anything you can do to help calm your mind at this time whether it be relaxation, mindfulness or self-care, just do it! All these strategies reduce stress and anxiety.

Mindfulness is renowned for helping calm the mind. The research has shown by simply engaging with a mindfulness technique we are bolstering our attentional filter and benefiting the immune system, among many other health gains. Plus, there is some evidence to show it has an anti-aging effect– just saying, it’s a benefit of practising. There are many easily accessible apps (i.e. Calm, Headspace, Smiling Mind) that offer mindfulness training. 

Connect:

While we are practising ‘social distancing’ this does not mean ‘antisocial’ or ‘solitary confinement.’ Many people are finding this hard, myself included, and small business owners are often already isolated.

Human Connection is key in feeling a sense of belonging and feeling supported. Please stay connected and know there are many sources of support. If you need some extra support, please know you can always contact the following services: Lifeline -131114 and Beyond Blue – 1300224636. 

In small business we know time is precious, so one last thing. While this moment in time is NOT ‘a day in reckoning,’ human beings are ‘a FORCE to be RECKONED with.’ Let’s get through this together.

Thinking of you. 

This article was written by contributor Dr Emmanuella Murray, Clinical Psychologist.